Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
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At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
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She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
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