you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize