batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
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