thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize