Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
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