sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
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she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
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I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
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