Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
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