Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize