There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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