So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
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He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
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Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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