Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
You have to summon your inner elephant
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
tell me about the eggs
Randomize