I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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