No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
i think i just lost a toe
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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