but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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