In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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