omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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