You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
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