when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Even the bartender felt bad for me
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why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
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Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
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