somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize