i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
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