The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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