Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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