we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize