You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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