I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Randomize