Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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