I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Randomize