filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
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