I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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