Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize