I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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