Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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