I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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