In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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