Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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