It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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