I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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