Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
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