can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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