Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
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