i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize