how hairy? two words: wookie tits
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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