32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
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