yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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