you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
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