she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
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