is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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