That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize