so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
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I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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