i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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